


The Five Other Times Puck Got the Shovel Talk. And the One Time Kurt Did.

by joeyrz



Category: Glee
Genre: 5 Times, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-01-28
Updated: 2010-01-28
Packaged: 2017-10-17 07:56:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 748
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/174607
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/joeyrz/pseuds/joeyrz
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This is a companion piece (of sorts) to pseudo_shigure’s "A Fair Warning is Only Fair When You Warn Both Parties" http://pseudo-shigure.livejournal.com/32289.html</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Five Other Times Puck Got the Shovel Talk. And the One Time Kurt Did.

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [A Fair Warning is Only Fair When You Warn Both Parties](https://archiveofourown.org/external_works/2788) by pseudo_shigure. 



**Mercedes**

Puck had just opened his locker before the first bell rang, when it slammed back shut. He followed the psychedelic zebra print (really, who wears that?) clad arm down to see Aretha in full diva face, her other hand on her hip. She let her hand drop from the locker and pushed a pointy finger at his chest. Puck unconsciously took a step back.

“Look, white boy. I don’t know what your deal with Kurt is. He says it’s just for shit and giggles, but I know my boy and he’s not like that. So this is your first and only warning: You hurt Kurt, you hurt one hair on his head, he sheds one tear over you and I’ll break your dick. Get it?”

She waited until he nodded, then turned dramatically, sashaying back to her locker.

He stayed slightly horrified for the next two classes.

 

 **Brittany**

They had History together, but Brittany never usually sat next to him, so when she bounced into the seat next to him, he smirked at her.

“Ew. Stop that. You’re with Kurt now,” she said, her face scrunched.

“I’m”

“Just don’t hurt him, ok? He’s cute, the Cheerios like him,” she finished and got back up to go to her usual seat.

Puck shook his head. He really didn’t understand girls.

 

 **Tina**

“P-puck?”

He looked up, surprised. He couldn’t remember Goth Girl ever talking to him... ever. Not even in Glee. But there she was, all black and pink layers and blue hair and boots to her knees. She grabbed a tray and got into line next to him.

“Yeah, what?” He wasn’t in the mood. History had been boring, and the nurse hadn’t been in today, so he’d gone to Math. Which gave him a real headache. He did well in the tests, but the teacher’s monotone drone was insufferable.

“If Kurt’s h-happy with you, then I-I’m happy. But, to q-q-quote Willow, if you hurt h-him, I will beat you to death with a sh-shovel. A v-v-vague disclaimer is nobody's friend.”

He felt his eyes open wide for a second, then he turned away from her, grabbing an apple from the basket in front of him, along with his half –filled tray and moved to the front of the line and cut in front of Jewfro to pay.

 

 **Mr. Shue**

Puck escaped from Spanish class, where Mr. S had stopped him from leaving after the bell rang. He didn’t want to talk about his grades yet, there was still 2 months of school left. But to his ever growing horror, the teacher had started advising him about how diferent things would be now for him and Kurt, and that if the other jocks started to give him a hard time, he could come to him. And to not let out his anger at Kurt, who “had been hurt enough times already”.

This was ridiculous. And he was pissed off. Next person who came up to him to warn him not to hurt Kurt was gonna regret it.

 

 **Rachel**

Unless is was Rachel Fucking Berry, who didn’t know the meaning of “fuck off” or to stop following him around when he stormed off.

“I’m just saying, that you need to be careful with Kurt. He’s not as strong as he pretends to be, and we need him for Regionals. He needs to be able to focus on singing, not on heartbreak or worrying if you’re cheating on him or something. A happy team is a winning team!”

What he needed was a slushie. To shut her up.

He opened his locker and dropped his head inside.

 

 **Artie**

Kurt smiled as Artie rolled up to him as they walked towards the music room. “Tell me you weren’t giving Puck a hard time too? I told you guys this morning, it’s nothing serious. We’re just messing around. It’s a phase for him and if I get to have a little bit of action while he rediscovers his straightness, then it’s ok. I’m not expecting anything from him.”

Artie looked up at his friend, sad that he was right.

“Kurt, I don’t think this is just a phase for Puck. And he might look like a badass, but I think he actually likes you. Don’t fuck it up, because of what you’re expecting or not expecting of him. Don’t hurt him, ok?” He didn’t wait for a response, just rolled away and into the music room, leaving a stupefied Kurt behind.

End

**Author's Note:**

> The "shovel talk" is a reference to Willow, from B:TVS.


End file.
